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11 Questions to Plant the Seeds for Creating Confidence

Updated: Nov 17, 2022

Confidence is a state of mind. When we feel confident, we accept ourselves and believe in our abilities. When we don't feel confident, we can become stressed, anxious, unfulfilled and ultimately, unhappy.

Low self-confidence is something many of us suffer with. It can be a result of many factors, such as fear of the unknown, low self-esteem, or fear of how other people see us. This lack of confidence can hold us back from developing both personally and professionally.

Having confidence in your abilities does not mean performing tasks perfectly. In fact, a big part of having self-confidence is knowing how to deal with mistakes when they occur.

Having confidence can make a huge difference in many areas of our lives.

Two key areas that benefit are your career and relationships:

Career - Lacking confidence at work can stop you from voicing your opinion and trying new things. This can hinder your progression and stunt your development. Building confidence at work can help you reach your full potential and ensure your voice is heard.

Relationships - When you have low self-confidence it can affect your relationships with friends, family and partners. It may hold you back from meeting people or cause you to isolate yourself socially. Improving this can help you feel more comfortable in social environments.

Everyone is born with confidence; it is the false beliefs that for one reason or another end up in our unconscious that deplete our confidence. By unlearning this, our confidence levels return to how they would be naturally.


The first task is to break old habits and practice developing some new habits. Start by making the decision that you will try to `sling self-criticism out of the window’ and instead apply more focus onto your qualities, skills and achievements.

Begin responding to the following questions (make a list of your responses to consider later):

Question 1: Within the next 5 years I want to achieve…..

Question 2: Something I do well enough is…..

Question 3: I am proud that I…….

Question 4: I am not afraid to…

Question 5: My greatest achievement is….

Question 6: My best personal quality is…

Question 7: One of my best skills is….

Question 8: Something I can now do which I could not do five years ago is…

Question 9: One way I help others is by…

Question 10: One challenge I have faced in the last 10 years is…

Question 11: One thing I have learnt from past mistakes that can help me in the future is…

If you get stuck answering any of these questions then ask a friend to help you think of some answers. Focus on developing your answers to this list rather than on thinking about what you can’t do or what has gone wrong in your life.

The important element is to train yourself to become more focused on what you have done well enough versus what you believe you haven’t!

Keep a confidence diary.

Start taking note of what you can and do achieve on a daily basis – this might include simple things like getting out of bed in the morning at a reasonable time to looking through the paper for jobs to apply for or completing a chore or simple task – each of these small things adds up on a day to day basis.

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